Rant: Fantasy vs. Real Life

( #FunnyPeople, #GrowingUp )

Last Wednesday I caught Funny People on HBO. I have seen the movie a few times, but I happened to tune in during the scene where Adam Sandler is giving a Thanksgiving toast (can’t find a clip). The point of the scene was that all of these friends who were fighting are reminded that this is their best time—so they should enjoy it.

This scene rattled in my head for a few days and merged with a year-long meandering thought about my own social circle. I don’t know if I am scratching this itch the right way, but I need to get it out of my head. I always expected my social circle to hit that sweet spot of enough career to have some savings, but not completely overwhelmed with jobs and children to be able to go on a few life changing vacations/experiences. It never really happened. We went on some trips, but never an ADVENTURE.

By the time the weekend rolled around and we had dinner with a few friends, I decided to let my group adventure fantasy go. Too much wine on the deck beats 13 hours in a car to Panama City. I think it is better to enjoy and savor the things our lives afford us, rather than wishing for the things that were never going to materialize. The ADVENTURE is a fantasy; it doesn’t matter what I do or where I go, it doesn’t ever satisfy the intangible expectations I put on it.

Instead of being unsatisfied, I’d rather re-think what true satisfaction is. Here is my advice to my peers: If you are sitting around thinking of what you want to be when you grow up or fantasize about quitting your job and opening a bed and breakfast. Grow the fuck up.

DID I JUST PISS ON YOUR DREAMS?

Good.

While I am sure you can reference some long shot example to prove me wrong, the statistics are in my favor that you are not going to be a professional athlete (even golfer), a rock star, a cowboy (do you even know what a cowboy does?). Do you have a business plan for that bed and breakfast (and do you like working 24 hours a day)? When I was 4 I used to tell my mother I was going to own a hamburger stand in space (this predates the Spaceballs diner scene). I am pretty damn glad I did not pursue my astro-culinary dreams because space is full of radiation and zero gravity doesn’t do much for your health either (35% bone and muscle mass loss after 6 months).

What is so bad with an average life? This is assuming no abusive domestic situation, not in jail, or had some other horrible thing happen. Maybe there are a few simple steps that can turn a shitty life into a perfectly average one? I guess what I am saying is just because you have a dream, it doesn’t mean it is a very good one. Find pleasure when and where you can, and be glad you don’t have a cell-mate named Bubba that offers to toss your salad.

Sweet Dreams.

PS: One more bit of advice – don’t wait around for other people to do what you want to do. There are so many places that I want visit that my friends have no interest in, but luckily my wife does. Its good to have a partner, but I would go myself if I had to and I suggest you do the same. Be strong!